Akhil Singh

Greetings, mere mortals! I am Akhil, a code conjurer so powerful that I make software bugs vanish faster than you can say "404!" As a Software Architect (basically, a fancy name for "I break stuff then fix it"), my responsibilities include summoning the dark arts of programming to create majestic backend systems plus occasionally answering phone calls from telemarketers.

When I'm not battling rogue null pointers, I'm busy fueling my superpowers with large doses of caffeine and compiling memes. Let's embark on this comedic journey together and maybe build something that doesn't crash on production.

Experience

LazyApply

Professional Chaos Coordinator | Bangalore, Karnataka

Sept 2024 – Present
  • Achieved peak productivity by convincing everyone that my laptop's blue screen of death was actually a new zen meditation feature
  • Revolutionized the meeting culture by strategically "freezing" during Zoom calls whenever asked about project deadlines
  • Mastered the art of turning "it's not a bug, it's a feature" into an inspirational poster that now hangs in every cubicle
  • Successfully transformed the coffee machine into our most reliable team member
  • Pioneered a groundbreaking system where all critical decisions are made by my office plant

Teachmint

Chief Debugging Detective | Bangalore, Karnataka

August 2023 – Oct 2024
  • Created a backend so fast it broke the space-time continuum
  • Built an AI that was supposed to grade assignments but instead started writing dad jokes
  • Invented a bug tracking system that became self-aware
  • Convinced the team that all system crashes were actually just the servers taking power naps
  • Developed a notification system that achieved sentience

Infra Market (Unicorn 2021)

Senior Code Whisperer | Bangalore, Karnataka

Sept 2021 – Aug 2023
  • Built microservices so micro they needed a quantum microscope to be found in production
  • Created a shopping cart that developed separation anxiety and wouldn't let items leave
  • Implemented a loyalty system that started giving points for users' Netflix watching habits
  • Engineered a database that refused to work on Mondays (turns out it was just really committed to work-life balance)

Yayshop (Acquired by Infra Market)

Digital Wizard In Training | Bangalore, Karnataka

Aug 2020 — Sept 2021
  • Launched an app that was so user-friendly it started making friendship bracelets for frequent users
  • Built a feedback system that became too emotionally attached to negative reviews and needed weekly therapy
  • Created a coupon system that started generating discount codes based on users' zodiac signs
  • Developed a CRM that began matchmaking lonely customer queries with compatible support tickets

Skills & Expertise

Programming Languages

GoLang 90%
Python 90%
C++ 80%

Databases

MongoDB 85%
Postgres 85%
Redis 80%

Cloud Services

Firebase 80%
AWS 75%
Google Cloud Platform 75%

Get In Touch

Bangalore, Karnataka | +91-9521876832

[email protected] | linkedin.com/in/akl773